On Patrol 4

It's crazy windy here in Durango today. Winds are gusting up to 50 mph! Earlier in the week there were reports that it might snow tonight, but I think the rain has moved on, so I'm thinking we've dodged that bullet. But I know you're interested in more than just the weather, so here's what's been going on in town according to the police reports (and these were so "good" I just had to add my own comments).

Friday, September 18th
5:14 p.m. A man in black shorts and a black jersey refused to pay to enter the Rec Center in the 2700 block of Main Avenue.
We're at the Rec Center all the time, how'd I miss the action?!

5:42 p.m. A caller complained about a group of people she didn't know camping in her driveway in the 900 block of Trail Road.
Can you imagine? I guess I'd walk out and say, "Hey Dudes, Can I get ya a s'more?"

Saturday, September 19th
12:00 a.m. Drivers in several cars were blowing air horns at cars from the Blockbuster parking lot in the 1300 block of Main Avenue.
They would have loved having me drive by, air horns always make me jump and squeal.

5:05 p.m. A security alarm went off in the 100 block of east 30th Street. It later was found to have been tripped by a squirrel.
I'm tellin' ya, these squirrels are dangerous up here.

9:21 p.m. Two women were walking in the middle of Ophir Drive wearing only their underwear.
Jason would have loved seeing that!

Sunday, September 20th
6:05 p.m. A drunken woman with a pink tank top and red pants was sitting next to a flower bed near 31st Street and East Third Avenue.
Nope, not me. I do have a pink tank top, but no red pants...

Friday, September 25th
5:50 p.m. A car was taking up three spaces in the Chez Grand-Mare parking lot.
So excited to learn that calling the cops about these kind of annoyances is totally appropriate.

8:06 p.m. Three juveniles were mooning vehicles at Riverview Elementary School.
That's JR's school! I can't believe we missed the show!

9:28 p.m. A man was in the women's restroom at Jenkins Ranch Park in the 400 block of Jenkins Ranch Road.
Aren't the lines in the women's long enough already? We don't need men in there too, geez!

Tuesday, September 29th
10:14 a.m. A husky was harassing wildlife near a pond in Durango West II.
Husky, Dude, I know you're a dog and all, and people here treat you better than their children, but Man, you can't harass the wildlife. I'm pretty sure they take away your Durango residence card for that. (I'd also avoid harassing bicyclers if I were you).