Reason 463 I Don't Like to Cook

I'm a much better planner than I used to be.

Having 3 boys tends to require some pre-planning to even leave the house. (Although I still never seem to have snacks, juice, Neosporin, or the occasional change of clothes at the ready.)

But I'm a terrible planner when it comes to cooking.
I always get right in the middle of it, and then I don't have something I need.

So reason #463 I don't like to cook: too much prep work.

(AKA: I'm never prepared!)

I bought some red velvet cupcake mix thinking I might make some for Valentine's Day.  I didn't buy cupcake liners because I was sure I had a million in the pantry.

I didn't make the cupcakes for Valentines, but I did need cupcakes for Cub Scouts last night.
(They decorated cupcakes to celebrate Scouting being 101 years old.)

 I started making cupcakes about 2:00 PM yesterday (during nap time, of course).  And guess what I didn't have?

Yep. Cupcake liners.

And since I had 2 children sleeping, and the grocery store is more than just a little jaunt from my house, here's how the cupcakes turned out....

Naked cupcakes!

I'm guessing this is why God gave me boys.

Little girls would have wanted to match their frosting and sprinkles to the cupcake liner.

I don't think the Cub Scouts slowed down long enough too even notice the liners were missing!

It Was Like a Norman Rockwell Painting

Is there anything more beautiful, calm, and serene than baking Christmas cookies with your kids?

I know mine are so well behaved, patient, and not messy.

Ahhh.

What a sweet time together.

Let's take a look at the "memories" we made yesterday.

Now don't worry about Kyle's seemingly "ang-a-ree" mood.

It was all my fault.

 I was the mean mom that wouldn't let him sit on the footstool JR was using, and made him sit on a barstool instead so he could actually see what was going on.

Just look how thrilled he is about baking with mom!

He was so sad when he told us he'd be leaving the baking area to go watch TV.

Worried you hadn't seen The Cake Boss? 

He took a long nap yesterday, so you can imagine how excited he was when he marched in to find we had started without him. 

 

You'll notice I have tons of pictures since the mishaps were few and far between. 

Just check out the dough stuck to JR's rolling pin. 

The tell-tale sign of an expert baker.

Later,  Kyle walked in like this and announced, "I'm going to lunch."

 I was having so much fun I had no desire to scream out, "Take me with you!"

Good times. Good times.

So Not a Cake Wreck!

Jason and JR spent most of Sunday afternoon working on their cake for the Father/Son Cub Scout Cake Bake. 

I was actually really impressed with Jason.  Jason's a great cook, but I do all the baking/decorating in the house, so I wasn't expecting him to be able to make a cake. I even called my dad to say, "Well, you know it would be amazing if JR was making it with you. But Jason? Eh. He's not like we are."

Jason, I take back what I said.  You did great!

Reed was seriously upset that he wasn't allowed to help.  So, in typical Reed fashion, he tried his best to be in everybody's business anyway and "boss" from the sidelines.

I almost freaked out when Jason started icing the cupcakes to look like tree leaves.  It was almost as exciting as learning he could make balloon animals!

Finished cake awaiting judging

I couldn't believe it. JR actually won 2nd place!

 (I'm in the picture with him since I was helping hand out awards.  I know you're shocked.  Me...right in the middle of everything.)

The competition was fierce. You can check out most of the other cakes over at our Pack 504 blog.

Jason and JR with their winning masterpiece.

My New Go-To

I've spent waaayyyy too many hours icing cupcakes, decorating cookies, and making insane food projects. (Rice Krispie sushi, anyone?)

But as of today, I have the perfect school party food.

It was beyond easy, the kids loved it, and is now my new official go-to. 

I figure I can just change the candy out with each season.

popcorn, mini pretzels, and candy corn mix

As for JR's school party...I guess it was his ninja like prowess that landed him the coveted seat between two of the cutest girls in the class.

Cupcakes of Doom: The Final Chapter

Well it turns out JR did win a prize (actually some really nice prizes) for the cupcakes.  (You know the ones...the worst tasting cupcakes ever.)

I got an email this week that JR should come to the Area Builders Association dinner meeting (the sponsors of the Cupcake Wars to promote the Parade of Homes) at the Strater Hotel Theater to receive his award. (If you've ever been to Durango, then you know the Strater is basically one of the fanciest places we have.)

I was getting more and more nervous about revealing myself in public in relation to these cupcakes. (Especially at a big meeting at the schmancy Strater.) But I figured, ohhh surely they won't remember JR's cupcakes.

I was wrong.

The MC of the evening had actually been one of the cupcake judges, but she wasn't saying anything about any of the other winners. She was strictly calling out names and prizes. (At this point I was still holding on to hope and a shred of dignity.)

Now, you know I love a good embellishment of a story if it needs a little spicing up, but I promise you...this is exactly what she said:

And our winner for Most Creative Cupcake is... JR Ingersoll

(JR walks forward)

Now let me tell you something about JR's cupcakes.  They were baked inside ice cream cones, and each one had a little surprise inside for us (a mini MilkyWay).

I'm telling you, his cupcakes were really something......
(super long pause)
......interesting.

And there you have it.  The word "interesting" confirms that these poor people were very aware that they had tasted the worst cupcakes ever.

But JR, being JR (and exactly like me), was thrilled with his win.  He was telling anybody who would listen how he plans to be a chef and open a restaurant that only serves meat and desserts. (Because why would anybody want to eat a disgusting fruit or vegetable?)  And how he has big plans to enter the gingerbread house contest that is supposedly taking place in November.  Awe-some.

But seriously, this is one happy kid. 

Oh, and as for prizes, he won a free movie ticket (score!) and a gift certificate to the local candy store. Pretty sweet! (Yes, JD, I went there with the pun.)

Ice Cream Screaming Update

Remember these?

I really hadn't given them much thought (guess I was trying to block them from my tastebuds' memory).  But for some reason I thought about them last night, and decided to see if I could find out who won.  Now, of course, JR didn't win. But I am guessing they gave all the kids that entered a "prize" since, according to the newspaper, JR "won" Most Creative Design. 

And why the quotation marks for the words 'prize' and 'won'?

Well, he didn't actually win anything, nor did anybody even tell us he'd won.  (Not that I expect and/or want a prize, I still feel like we owe the people that had to taste these things an apology.)

This morning I told JR of his winning and he was beyond excited. 

JR: You mean I won the whole thing?! I won first place?!

Me: No, you won Most Creative Design.

JR: What do I get?! What do I win?!

Me: I don't know. We'll just have to see.

Guess you can figure out how I'll be spending my afternoon...

I really do need to stock up on glitter and construction paper for emergency "award" situations such as this.

I Scream for Ice Cream (Literally)

JR wanted to enter a Cupcake Wars contest we saw advertised in town. Since he likes to cook, and my cupcakes are usually pretty good, I thought it would be a fun thing to do together. I saw these ice cream cone cupcake in a magazine and ours actually came out looking just like the picture.

Now before anybody gets excited, you'll notice I said ours came out "looking just like the picture." Because these are far and away the worst tasting cupcakes I've ever put in my mouth. You have to bake them in the cones, and I don't know if the batter in the cones is just too much for the high altitude or what, but....BLEH! Every batch was either overcooked to the consistency of a rock, or almost burnt on top with a raw inside.

JR was still excited about them, and I figured since we'd gone to all that work to make them we'd just go ahead and enter them. But getting the cupcakes to the contest was harder than I ever could have imagined. We finally had JR holding 2, Jason driving and holding 2, Ayi holding 3 or 4 and me trying to manage the rest. By the time we got there we had all dropped them, smushed them, or crushed them until they looked as bad as they tasted.

JR asked me this morning when we'd find out if he won. Bless his heart.

Spoiled Rotten

Ayi decided it was dumpling day yesterday. (Woohoo!)

Our Chinese chefs at work.


JR + giant butcher knife that only comes out when Ayi visits + no trip to the emergency room = successful onion chop. (And you'll also notice his shirt didn't stay on long.)

JR ate 17 dumplings last night! (And if you're wondering about the little red man, he's like training wheels for chopsticks.)

Ayi wouldn't dare pack The Little Emperor plain ol' left over dumplings in his lunch today, so she got up early and fried these special for him. Although I did pop one in my mouth after I took the picture...she wasn't looking, of course!

I Don't Camp

Yet another reason my Durango Card might be snatched away from me at any second...I'm not a camper. And when I say people are really into camping here, I'm talking about overhearing moms discussing "mother/daughter campouts", and girls weekends that are *gasp* camping. So when I told the Cub Scout parents that I would "be in charge", I prefaced it with...'but I'm not going camping.' Thankfully, other parents have steped in for the camping thing, and JR is leaving in a little while for his first Scout campout. He's been counting down the days since last week, and although I'm not going with him, I thought I'd make him a breakfast to start the day off right.

And just in case you can't tell what my "cooking" is supposed to be: It's a camper in a sleeping bag. See it now?

And Here's The Proper Post

I got JR settled in his class without a hitch this morning, due largely in part to Kyle and Reed's backpacks. (As you can see they thought the water fountains were amazing. ) You might notice the tail coming off Kyle's backpack. The backpacks are monkeys, and that tail doubles as a leash...hence the reason we were able to get in and out without making a scene.

JR said he had a good day, not a lot of details, so we're going with no news is good news. Here he is after getting off the bus.

I got him a cake donut pan as a first day of school surprise. He was thrilled and wanted to get right to work making donuts as soon as he got home...and took off his shirt.

I just had to get a close up since they came out so cute!

A True Flop of a Cookie

JR and I made flip-flop cookies today. They're somewhat labor intensive (only because they're so small it makes them hard to work with), so I'm glad we made them while Kyle and Reed were napping. I can't imagine the mess if those two had been involved. Aren't they cute on their bed of "sand"?

Who in the World is Doing the Cooking Tonight?

I know there's already the Naked Chef, but looks like we've got the market cornered on the Shirtless Chef!

Some Southern Chefing

I hadn't "cooked" with the kids in awhile, and when I saw this recipe for S'mores Stuffed Brownies I couldn't think of anything that would taste better. I guess the kids were ready to put their culinary skills back to work because when I hollered out, "Who wants to cook?!" I heard 3 voices squeal "Meeeeee!" and stools were in cooking positions before I could even get the ingredients out. Speaking of ingredients, these 2 were guarding them with their life...or maybe somebody was just trying to eat the marshmallows through the package.

The Boss supervised JR's every move very closely. Kyle played with his spoon.

Still scrutinizing the situation. And playing with a spoon.

Kyle perked up when it was time to stir.

Humm, for some reason quite a few of our graham crackers had bite marks in them.

Don't let Kyle's lack of marshmallows in front of him fool you into thinking he was working the hardest at layering them in the pan. He was shoving fist fulls in his mouth as fast as he could.

Our finished product.

And just like Truvy's Cuppa, Cuppa, Cuppa I knew it was going to be a little rich, so I "served it over ice cream to cut the sweetness"! (I seriously did.)

JR said it was the best thing he'd ever put in his mouth!

Queen of Dinner? Yep, That's Me.

Once again, I give you my amazing culinary skills.

And tonight my dinner menu was so spectacular my praises were sung by everyone under our roof.

31 cent scoop night at Baskin Robbins.

Dinner is served!

Besides ice cream, we also got to enjoy: balloons, the fire truck, and seeing pretty much every resident of Durango.

Reason #46 I Hate To Cook

I always get hurt.

Photo Evidence From Today:

And for an added flair of dramatics, I took the liberty of labeling my injury for you.

Thankfully I don't proclaim to be a good cook, so it makes the way this injury happened a little more bearable.

Ya know the old saying about not being able to boil water? Well, I was able to boil the water. And was even able to pour the boiling water in the sink...but then I somehow lost control of the stupid pot and the top of it (the pot) touched my arm.

Awesome.

The Seriously Serious Chef

The Seriously Serious Chef (Reed) has advanced past just bringing his own stool to the island to help cook. He's now started meal planning. (Praise the Lord! I hate meal planning worse than cooking.)

We were in the grocery store the other day and he literally jumped out of the cart trying to get to the "make your own strawberry shortcake" display. We didn't think much of it when he demanded to hold the package of shortcakes, but when he screamed hysterically as Jason took the cakes for a second to be scanned, we knew something was up. Not only did he carry the shortcakes to the car, he refused to get in the car without them. Then he held them the whole way home. We even stopped at Sonic, but he wasn't letting go of those cakes.

I finally got them away from him (when we got home) by promising to make strawberry shortcake right away. Which pleased the Master Chef immensely.

Oh , and if you're wondering if JR eats strawberry shortcake, the answer would be no. He informed us he'd take his strawberry shortcake with just "cake and whip cream". When we informed him that he could only have the cake and whip cream with a strawberry there was wailing and gnashing of teeth like you wouldn't believe. Obviously he gets his dramatic flair from his daddy.

One Last Peep

Okay, so I've only got a few more hours to talk Peeps before Easter is over, so I'll hurry this along. We hosted an egg hunt/mini Easter party for our neighbors this afternoon, and here's one of the things I served. The pictures I saw of this on the Internet were much cuter than how mine turned out, but the kids loved it. I'm talking loved it. Big hit.

Peeps Blue Raspberry Sparkle

The Rainbow Connection

I know, I know. You're expecting me to change this over to a craftingcheffing blog any day now. But until then, I'll just keep dazzling you with my amazing homemaking skills. Today's feature is once again showcasing my cheffing talents.

I let the kids make the St. Patrick's Day rainbow cupcakes that are supposedly "all over the Internet". (Although, I only saw them one place.)

JR and I actually got the cake batter mixed up without our twin assistants. They were still napping. And would you look at that, I actually planned ahead. I have the extra 4 bowls out ready to mix in the different colors.

By color mixing time, The Babies were up. Reed moved his own stool to his cooking station and got to work. Kyle, like Mommy, needed a minute to wake up, so he was enjoying some juice and a little TV.

Our colors of the rainbow.

As I was taking the cupcakes out of their pans, this one's top fell off. (I wish my muffin top would fall off.) I couldn't believe it! They really do look like rainbows. Gross Play-Doh looking cupcake rainbows, but JR thought it was the coolest thing he'd ever seen.

Some green food coloring in the frosting container, a couple of stirs by each kid, and we were St. Patrick's day ready.

I'm guessing the more you mutilate the cupcake as you eat it, the better it tastes.

And it just wouldn't be one of my craftychefy blog posts without some sort of injury/kitchen mishap/ruining of the food, but these pretty much went off without a hitch. Of course, not one to disappoint you, I did stain my fingers with food coloring. And Martha would never let that happen.