Polar Lands (And NOT Durango This Time)

I went to JR's school yesterday to see his Power Point presentation on the Polar Lands.

Would ya look at that?

 Just as the super-divas before him (Cher, Madonna, Prince) he's already identifying himself by one name.

I know I'm showing my age here, but I still can't get over kids using Power Point.

After my first year of teaching I took a summer school "technology class" at SFA.

They taught us how to use Power Point (and send emails).

 I was the only teacher in my school that knew how to use it.

And I'm going to have to be the bragging mom here for a second, because JR did great.

His speaking voice was nice, slow, and clear.

And he worked that computer like a master.

I've seen Jason do lots of public speaking, and he really reminded me of him.

(And, of course, having a touch of my flair for the dramatics didn't hurt either!)

I also LOVED that this was a school project.

Everything was done at school, which was very obvious.

Some of the "interesting facts" I learned yesterday:

The black bear and the gorilla are animals that live together in the forest.

AND

The food chain for the grasslands...The lion eats the elk.

Like I said, Loved it!

Consider Yourself Celebrated, Earth Day

Soooo, as you can imagine, I was just thrilled when I learned JR's homework would be an Earth Day project instead of his standard math sheet. 

Oh yippee! 

My favorite fake holiday, Earth Day.

He was supposed to make a craft or sculpture out of trash/recycling. 

To be honest, I wasn't that upset about the assignment (I was upset it was in lieu of math, but hey, it's Durango...recycling and Earth Day are of the utmost importance.)

In fact, my mom used to assign "trash art" to her classes.

But here's where I got set off:

1. As a former teacher and daughter of school teacher parents, I'm well aware of a hard and fast rule:
 If a project is sent home, it's for the parents.  Not the kid.

As my mom always says, "If the teacher wanted a kid project, they'd do it at school."

2. This is only a 4 day week, and since the teacher wants it back on Thursday, that means she's expecting us to whip this out in 3 nights.

3. I also don't approve of giving projects that can't be finished over the weekend. 

I've got Jason out of town this week, I'm expecting 85 people at The Cub Scout Blue and Gold Banquet on Wednesday, and we've got activities every night. 
When am I (because remember, that's who she wants it done by) supposed to do this project?

So as I read over the information sheet I thought to myself...

"We're" doing this tonight.

I am not going to the store.

I am not buying supplies to make this. 

"We're" going to make this with what we have in this house!

I went and got 2 empty toilet paper rolls out of the trash, told JR to sit down beside me, and started Googling.

(And on a side note, Thank you Mama and Daddy for all my amazingly, creative projects. Y'all had to do all those with no Internet. I have it way too easy!)

But as JR sat there, staying busy helping, we came up with this.

We used two toilet paper rolls and a cardboard box. 

(And hot glue, of course.)

Done. And Done. 

I'm still not sure if JR's calling it an alligator, a crocodile, or a dragon. 

 And I don't really care.

The important part is JR's really proud of our project.

Way too much green going on in this picture!

It'll be a Bloody Good Time

Although JR and I do share lots of the same qualities, (flair for the dramatics, anyone?) unlike me, he could seriously care less about what goes on his body. Knowing it was picture day today he asked me what he had to wear.  The tone in his voice was as if I was going to make him the holy martyr of St. Tuxedo. 

And of course, seconds after getting dressed, I noticed his nose started bleeding. (JR has terrible nose bleeds during the fall and winter here.  He often comes home from school looking like Sissy Spacek in Carrie.) I had tissues in his hands immediately, but he was still able to get blood smeared across his forehead.  

I started imagining JR's 2nd grade picture with him wearing a shirt that looked like he'd used it to clean up a blood-bath.  (Which would actually be fairly accurate since he seems to think his shirts make better tissues than, well, tissues.)

I packed another shirt in his bag this morning and gave him precise instructions that if he gets blood on his shirt before pictures to change shirts.  His main concern? Could he change shirts after pictures even if he didn't get blood on it...because how dare I make him be so dressed up in a *sigh* collared shirt all day.

So what's my bet on what his school picture will look like?

He'll be wearing the extra t-shirt, and it'll be covered in blood. 

Along with dried blood smeared all over his face. 

Last year he was missing an arm, and this year he'll be bloody. You'd think the child went to Horror High!

Running with the Wolves

JR's school had their fun run last week and the kids were encouraged to dress as super heroes.  When I explained the costuming situation a month ago, JR informed me he didn't want to dress up, then the day before the run he changed his mind. 

With a days notice I had no time to come up with something fun and manly-fabulous, so I had to settle for the WalMart Halloween section.  My choice of Wolverine was JR approved, and I have to say, it was super easy to find him in the crowd!

I did love that most of the girls chose some form of a fairy/princess/butterfly/ballet tu-tu combination as their superhero of choice.  Just check out the get-up the girl in front of JR has on.  Super Cat Girl?

JR got pretty hot in his Wolverine suit, (And BTW, I'm gonna show my age here by saying that I can't actually say or think the word "Wolverine" unless it's done like Lea Thompson in Red Dawn style.) so the costume came off and the muscles came out.

After JR's first lap around he asked me to run with him, which was quite interesting for me since here were my running shoes that day.

Scary, Scary Stuff

I got such a sad, depressing letter from JR's teacher yesterday. I figured this day was coming, but I was hoping maybe it wouldn't.

*big sigh huffy breath*
JR will be having spelling tests every Friday.

Yep, the famous spelling test. Oh the fun memories I have studying spelling words as a little girl. Those Thursday nights were always filled with such happiness and laughter.
Just...
so.
much.
fun.

And I don't even want to know what Jason made on spelling tests as a kid. I knew spelling was not his forte' when he once asked me how to spell 'Christmas'. I also knew where he got his spelling genes when Jason's dad called and asked him how to spell 'Sherry'. (Which is Jason's mom's name!)

But really, who needs to study spelling words now that we have God's gift to the world, spellcheck? Yes, everyone needs to know their homophones, homonyms, and homographs. (I'm always petrified I'm going to use 'their', 'they're', or 'there' incorrectly when I'm writing in a hurry.) But if the kids have to have spelling tests, can't they just be to see if they can get close enough for spell check to fix it?

I'll keep you updated on how studying "our" spelling words goes. But if you hear wailing and gnashing of teeth coming from our direction, JR's cries are just slightly more pitiful than mine.

And Here's The Proper Post

I got JR settled in his class without a hitch this morning, due largely in part to Kyle and Reed's backpacks. (As you can see they thought the water fountains were amazing. ) You might notice the tail coming off Kyle's backpack. The backpacks are monkeys, and that tail doubles as a leash...hence the reason we were able to get in and out without making a scene.

JR said he had a good day, not a lot of details, so we're going with no news is good news. Here he is after getting off the bus.

I got him a cake donut pan as a first day of school surprise. He was thrilled and wanted to get right to work making donuts as soon as he got home...and took off his shirt.

I just had to get a close up since they came out so cute!

Hot Off The Presses

I figure these first day of school pictures should hold the grandmothers over until I have time for a proper post.

The Last...

day of school.
Here's the requisite first and last day pictures to compare. And I know I should have taken them in the same spot, but it was super sunny this morning, so we had to find some shade. You know how JR is about the sun and picture taking.

First Day:


Last Day


Here he is celebrating the end of 1st grade with his buddies at Dairy Queen. Of course JR's still wearing his "it's my birthday hat". What can I say, I'd have still been wearing the hat too. (His birthday is actually Saturday.)


And JR wasn't the only one celebrating. William's sister, Isabelle, was there too. And as you can see by the looks on Kyle and Reed's faces, she's one of their very favorite people...so they pretty much thought it was a party for them.

My Hair Grew Back!

JR and I have both loved his teacher this year. Her teaching style reminds me a lot of my mom's...And just like my mom always did, JR's teacher made sure he had plenty of Mother's Day gifts to give yesterday. One of my favorites was a little book titled "Mom and I", and of course, I have the best pages to share with you.

I'll show you the picture first, and then will interpret 1st grade handwriting and give my commentary below.


You probably got this one: Ride Roller coasters
What's funny is Saturday night Jason and I had gone to dinner and I was telling him, "I'm so glad you're going to Fiesta Texas with us this summer. My stomach just can't take 5 times on Tony Hawk's Big Spin." And if you look closely at the picture, JR drew himself with a big smile and me with an "Oh!" face. We're also frighteningly tan.



My Mom and I watch: Extreme Water Parks. That would be a backward "P" that was somewhat corrected.
JR and I watch a lot of Travel Channel together, but we watch way more America's Funniest Home Videos (Praise the Lord it comes on right as I'm trying to cook dinner because all the kids love it!). Obviously JR has summer vacation on the brain.
From the looks of things I believe I'm about to go down the slide, as it seems JR is the one already upside down. Unfortunately, I might also be nude. Which I can guarantee would never happen.


And my favorite...

My hair is back! I'm bald no more! Sure JR has realized that at 5'2" he might as well go ahead and draw himself as tall as me. But who cares?! I'm skinny AND have hair. Not much hair, but it's there! Maybe this summer we'll practice drawing my hair more Jennifer Anistony and less Keri Russell When She Chopped Off All her Hair and Ruined Felicity.

Arbor Day, Schmarber Day

This morning I attended a full blown, 2 hour, every elementary school in the district, tree extravaganza. Complete with songs, Kyle and Reed acting like 2 year olds, and me having a knock-down-drag out-fight with one of JR's teachers. (And since I probably shouldn't say which teacher it was, I'll just say that he only goes to this class twice a week, and doesn't do P.E. or art.)

First, JR.

Here's the only time I saw, and only picture I got, of the poor child. (More on why later.)

Kyle and Reed actually did good for about the first 15 minutes of the show. We saw Smokey the Bear, listened to the mayor talk, and made it through about 3 elementary performances.

Here's Kyle reading the program. Reed was in my lap. All was good.

Now had the Arbor Day Show (from here on out known as ADS) only been 15 minutes, we'd have been great. (And when you think about it, 15 minutes is a super long time for 2 year old twin boys to sit still.)

But the show wasn't 15 minutes, in fact, it was AN HOUR and FIFTEEN MINUTES before JR got up to "perform".

But before we get to JR's "performance", let's talk about what Kyle and Reed did for that hour in between:

(By this time I had moved to the corner of the gym with them.) They slapped each other with their caps, ran around on their squeaky shoes, cried when I took their squeaky shoes off, had to leave the show while they cried, ran out the gym and tried to run out the front door.

Needless to say after an hour of trying to keep them under control, I was frazzled. There was another little 2 year old boy there and they started running around with him. Unfortunately for me, they started running toward the performance area. Now the other mom and I were trying our best to keep them from running up there, but I think it's much more distracting to see kids plus and adult running past, so we didn't chase after them. They probably ran up there about 3 times, and apparently 3 times is all JR's teacher can take because she marched over to me and told me if I was going to let my kids run around (like I let them do that because I'm such an incompetent mom) then I need to take them outside.

Me: When are they going to sing? As soon as they sing, I'll leave. And, besides, YOU have kids. You should be more understanding.

(On a side note, this teacher happened to be eating out with her family the night we made all the napkin hats and accessories. Of course, we thought we were hilarious so we were all laughing and having a good time. Let's just say from the looks on her face then, she was not amused with us. But then again, her children were so well behaved they didn't need to make napkin hats.)

I also then told her: I'm tired of you being pissed (yes, I used the word "pissed") about my kids all the time. You basically stoped the show at Family Night to go give my kids 'go to hell looks' (Yep, I said that too. My mom is queen of the expression 'go to hell looks', and really, it is the best way to describe "that look".) I'm doing the best I can. If you don't want 'families' at Family Night or these shows, then don't invite the kids! (I didn't mention JR's "performance" at family night in this post since I was still huffy about the afore mentioned "looks" my kids were given.)

She then told me something about how I couldn't talk to her that way and walked off.

And here's the best part. So every other school in the district had performed by now. Some had poems and speaking parts, but almost everybody did a song. All of the songs were sung a cappella. And one of the schools even used sticks they had picked up in their yards to keep the beat (That was really cute.) So what was JR's "performance"? Well, his teacher turned on a CD of other kids singing to have our kids "sing" a long with. So yeah, I waited an hour and fifteen minutes for a lip sync number. Great. If I want to hear other kids singing I'll watch American Idol. And the other best part? JR was nowhere to be seen. Can you find him? Nope. Me neither.

So even though the ADS was a community event advertised all over the place, apparently 2 year old twins whose mother can't control them were not welcome by certain teachers. I wish they had put that in the flyer, it would have made my morning so much easier!

Brainwashed I Tell Ya!

JR came home from school yesterday and announced that he was participating in Turn off the TV Week. (It also includes DVDs, computer games, the Wii, and the Nintendo.) I, of course, would never encourage this kind of behavior since, to quote Clariee from Steel Magnolias, I "was raised right." And raised this way I was. Here's the following comments about JR's Turn off the TV Week declaration from my immediate family:

JR: I can't watch TV, or play Wii, or do anything electronical for the whole week.
My Dad: Oh my goodness. These Mountain People have brainwashed you!

(A note to the "Mountain People", my dad loves your physical fitness, healthiness, and native flora and fauna. He's just worried that the high number of Obama bumper stickers around town means that Turn off the TV Week is a governmental imposed agenda to keep people from watching Sean Hanity.)

Jason (on the phone on the way home from work): What's JR doing?
Me: Putting together a puzzle. He wants to do Turn off the TV Week.
Jason: He wants to do that? Wow, they've brainwashed him.
Me: That's exactly what my dad said!
Jason: I hope you don't think we're doing that.
Me: Puh-leaze. I'm on my computer right now and Dancing With the Stars is on tonight.

So yeah, JR's on his own on this one. Good thing MawMaw and PawPaw loaded him down with books from his school book fair. And whose genius idea was it to combine Grandparents' Day and the book fair? Genius I tell ya. I would have let JR buy one book, instead he walked out with a bag full. But seriously, just look how cute my Mountain Person and Country Folks are.

(JR's room at school, pre book fair)

Wanna Help Me With MY Homework?

Whether you personally know me or not, one thing you probably do know is that math and I are not friends. So you can imagine the fear that struck my heart when JR whipped out fractions for 1st grade homework. Okay, so I'm kidding (a little). I can do first grade math, but I really started to doubt myself when JR's homework came back looking like this.

Immediately I was mordified that I'd let JR miss all these. (He did it, and I checked it.) So I went to the experts. Luckily I have a mechanical engineer (by degree, anyway) as a husband and a Chinese kid living in my house. Math? Yeah, we should have it covered. And since the engineer and the Chinese kid can't figure out what's wrong (and Facebook friends have confirmed that number 4 is right) I'm bringing it to you. Ideas?

10 Apples Up on Top

It was Read Across America Day yesterday and JR was supposed to dress up like a Dr. Seuss character. And with the only Hobby Lobby an hour drive from my house, I knew I needed to come up with something fairly easy. Easy, but original and, of course, funny.
Though you can't tell from this picture, JR did think 10 Apples Up on Top* was a funny idea. (You know how he is about having his picture taken in sunlight. Ugh!) And I will say this was one of the easiest projects I've ever done...except for the 3rd degree hot glue gun burn I inflicted on myself.

Since I had to make this Hobby Lobbyless, I found myself loading up my cart at Wallyworld with Styrofoam balls, red paint, glitter, and green pipe cleaners. My idea was to make the apples myself...when lo and behold, I happened upon decorative apples! And since buying premade apples was half the cost of making my own, I threw those apples in the basket as fast as I could. I was raised under my mother's motto, "Make it easy on yourself", and when it comes to crafting I have a motto of my own: Easier, cheaper, and non labor intensive beats messy, costly, and time consuming any day!

As for the only snafu in the process, here's my 3rd degree hot glue gun burn.

That would be the top of my leg. (No more crafting in shorts for me.) I thought the hot glue gun was out of glue so I was loading a new stick. Guess what? It wasn't out of glue. And as I loaded the new stick in, it pushed out the rest of the glue...right on my leg. On the bright side, I'm pretty sure I'm permanently waxed in that location for the rest of my life.

I never expected the costume to make it through the whole day. (JR is a boy, after all.) But the apples did stay all glued together, they just came apart from the headband. It might have even broken apart in his backpack. He said the headband started hurting his head around lunchtime, so he traded it in for this little number.

Just like me. Always up for multiple costumes...especially when they're hats!

*10 Apples Up on Top Costume Tutorial:

• supplies needed: headband, premade apples, hot glue gun
• step-by step instructions: Glue apples to headband.

Winter Olympian

We were watching the lugers in the Olympics last weekend and JR said, "Oh, that's the luge. I want to watch the skeleton. Call me when the skeleton comes on."

Me: What?! How do you know about the luge and the skeleton?

JR: I just know.

Me: Okay. What's the difference?

JR: Luge is on your back and the skeleton is on your stomach.

Me: How do you know that?!

JR: We luge and skeleton in PE.

Me: Of course you do.

And as we discovered at Parents Night, they've been more than luging and skeletoning, they're doing all kinds of Winter Olympics!

Bobsled

Short track speed skating. JR is super excited there's a skater with his name. So here's JR Ingersoll's impersonation of JR Celski.

William and JR cross country skiing.

I had to laugh out loud when JR asked me, "Mommy, do you want to curl with me?" JR claims he beat me, here he is trying to beat Harry too.

Judging that he's the curling winner.

Didn't See That One Coming

It was just yesterday I wrote a whole post about the fabulousness of male figure skating. Just yesterday I praised their fashion sense, use of feathers, and, of course, sequins. Then last night, something happened I never thought would happen in my entire life. My child....was the most underdressed child in the whole first grade. Gasp! Horror! Embarrassment and shame for my whole family!

It was 1st grade Family Night at JR's school, they sang songs from music class and also showed what they'd been learning in PE (more on that later). They told us that the kids should dress up, but come on, this is Durango. I just figured the kids would wear their dress snowpants. JR was in the Christmas play at church and wore a sweater and was dressed completely appropriate. I never dreamed kids would dress up for a school family night more than the church Christmas play! I almost died when we walked in. Every single boy but JR was wearing at least a button down long sleeve dress shirt. JR's friend, Kelley, ran up to him as soon as we got there and I did a double take. He was wearing a fedora! I turned to Kelley's mom and said, "Oh my goodness! Kelley looks like Justin Timberlake!" Of course I would have had JR in a 3-piece suit (or some other suitable boy band accessories) if I known what these kids were going to be wearing (because that fedora was seriously cute). JR kept talking about all the PE stuff they were going to do, so I had even thought about sending a pair of shorts for him! Naturally, I expected the girls to be decked out. JR said, "Mom! Did you see Emma? She looks like she's going to a fancy dinner!" But I never dreamed the boys would be so fancy. And just to show you I'm not exaggerating, here's a picture of JR standing on the risers about to sing. Now the kids had already done their PE show so most of the boys have their shirts untucked, but you'll see I'm not kidding...these guys were dressed up!

Vday Ready

I was laughing today when a Facebook friend said she was busy making elaborate Valentine's Day goodie bags for her daughter's class since she was the only one who sent "just cards" last year. Yep. I made that mistake too. For those of you moms who haven't sent a kid off to school yet...Yeah, um, you have to send more than just cards. And cards don't come with envelopes like they did when we were kids! The no envelope situation just blows my mind every year.
Thankfully, we finished up addressing Valentines tonight. Notice I said "we". I have a 1st grade boy. Anytime handwriting is involved it's a we project. JR actually does all the printing, I just have to be there for serious monitoring and moral support. We also break handwriting projects up over a few days, hence the finishing of the 'Tines tonight. Look at that happy face. Finished!

And since we now know you can't send "just cards", we added in Fun Dips.

And yes other boy moms in JR's class, I know you're loving me as your son is only having to write 2 letters when addressing cards to JR. (And I'm sure the little girls are loving me too since JR's name leaves them plenty of room to draw extra flowers, ponies, and kittens.)

I'm Mom of the Year...Again!

I just got a call from JR's teacher (he's being a bit attitudinal today). But she also told me a lunch incident that should have my Mother of The Year trophy arriving any minute. I forgot to put a fork in JR's lunch this morning. Now normally this wouldn't be that big of a deal, but the cafeteria ladies wouldn't let him use one from the cafeteria line. (JR's teacher agreed that was ridiculous.) I think they have aides or volunteers who watch the kids during lunch, so the aide/volunteer that was on duty borrowed a fork from another kid and told JR she would wash it with soap and water and it would be just like a new fork. Well, if you're a regular reader or have met JR for more than 5 minutes then you know how that turned out. I even said to his teacher before she finished, "Oh yeah, there's no way he was going for that." (And right now both of JR's grandmothers are saying "I wouldn't have either!") Poor thing. Since he couldn't eat his pasta because I forgot to pack a fork, (and he wouldn't use a used fork) he couldn't have his cookie, which means the poor child had no lunch today. Thankfully it's Thursday so we'll be making our weekly Sonic happy hour slushy run before gymnastics. This Mom of the Year will be buying that baby anything else he wants too. Of course we'll still be having a little talk about his attitudinal problem, we'll just be having it as he stuffs his face...and I wait for my trophy to arrive.

Toothless Tuesday on a Monday

I'm pretty sure JR's teacher was the happiest of all to see his top tooth finally come out. He's been obsessed with it at home for a week now, so I can only imagine the tooth hijinks that have been going on at school. As in...."I turned my tooth sideways with my tongue and made all the girls scream". I'm sure that didn't disrupt class in any way, shape, or form. And yes, only one tooth came out. I know it looks like both his top teeth are gone, but they're not. The spaces between his teeth are just that big. I'm guessing orthodontics will be part of our future. The Tooth finally fell out today while he was in music, which means that besides the fanfare of loosing a tooth at school, he also got that cute little necklace to bring it home in. And Murphy's Law: I got a call on Friday that JR was ready to graduate from speech...and now he's missing a top tooth. "Th" sound, we almost had you!

It Happens in Threes

Today was the day. The excitement trifecta:

Pajama day.
Party day.
Play date.

The Perfect Storm of activities which all converged this December 18th and jolted JR out of bed at 6:00 AM. It was almost too much for his little 6 year old heart to endure. But endure we did. And when I say "we", I most obviously mean "me", as JR was much too busy swinging from the rafters to notice The Storm he was riding out.

So let's start at the beginning.

Pajama Day.
And just to kick it up a notch...Star Wars pajamas.


School Christmas party.
Like Hugh Hefner, Kyle and Reed also enjoy lounging in pajamas all day, so it was an easy wardrobe choice for them on PJ day. As you can see, I didn't have any problems keeping them occupied while the kids were at the all school sing-a-long.


But when the party started it was a completely different story. Of course they were both insistent on sitting in JR's chair. And since JR isn't a little girl, he was having none of that. I finally satisfied everbody by pulling up 2 extra chairs.


And to complete the excitement trifecta: Play date.
It'd been a long day, so I took the liberty of taking the kids to Happy Hour. Now don't get all up-in-arms, I bought the first round! Sure I had 5 kids in the car, but nothing tates as good as a Sonic slushy after a hard day.

Was Wendy on the Mayflower?

If you know my mom, then you know she doesn't care for Thanksgiving food. She starts in around September letting everyone know she's "not a turkey and dressin' fan". She even has a turned-up, wincey face she makes so you know she's serious about her distaste. And so it seems our favorite picky eater, JR, has inherited the "Non Fan of Thanksgiving Food Gene". JR eats exactly two things at Thanksgiving dinner: corn and Cousin Caleb's reindeer cookies. (And in case your wondering, the rest of us all eat and love traditional Thanksgiving yummys.) With the big day being right around the corner, JR's school had their Thanksgiving lunch in the cafeteria today, and of course, the parents were encouraged to come and eat with their child. I figured there was about a 50% chance that corn would be on the menu, but I was quite certain Cousin Caleb's reindeer cookies would be nowhere to be found. So what did I do?

I brought in Wendy's.

Now, the way I see it, I'm either:
A. A fun and fabulous mom.
B. A total enabler to my son's picking eating.
C. Completely given up in the food department and decided to blame "Nature" over "Nurture"
or
D. Have eaten enough school cafeteria food to know it can't even pretend to compete with Wendy's.

Answer: I'm going with "all of the above".

So here's the Ingy version of a Thanksgiving school lunch. (My mom will be so proud.) Except there were no costumes, in a true Ingy version there would be Indian headdresses and Pilgrim bonnets at a minimum. But you can see JR's super cool "woven" placemat he made for the occasion.